Tuesday, December 9, 2014

Rejection Tuesday


Sounds of Italy 
by Joanne Faries

gladiator echo in the Colosseum
ruts of chariot wheels in Pompeii
ancient rumble of carts hauling wares
operatic arias reverberate in Venice
gondolier chatter, tourist camera clicks
shopkeeper patter, rustle of money exchange
Latin chant rolls with the mists surrounding Assisi
slurp of  gelato tongue tingle
shoe shuffle stumble on cobblestones
inner grazie for the life concerto
 
 
 
 
 
 
sigh - rejected as "where's the ebb and flow? " and "too many adjectives"
 
Oh well.

7 comments:

  1. Those rejectors don't know what they are talking about.

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    1. thanks. I'm used to it, but sometimes you are sure a poem is perfect for that journal. How can they not feel it? Oh well. I appreciate your support

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  2. I thinks it's very atmospheric. I do a shoe shuffle stumble on cobbles quite often - impossible to walk over them in heels!

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    1. thanks. Guess I was looking for some reassurance that my writing isn't total crap.

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  3. You had me at "slurp of gelato tongue tingle!" I loved The Sounds of Italy like Delores, and I know the rest of the Old Broads would feel the same way!

    Julie

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  4. Well, you took me right to Italy!

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  5. I really like this! I felt like I was right there.

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