Movie Review Madness - The Magnificent Seven

Yes, 1960 had Yul Brynner, Steve McQueen and Charles Bronson headlining a western. That was a long time ago and you can watch it on any classic movie channel. But there’s nothing wrong with rounding up a new herd of actors and bringing The Magnificent Seven to the big screen again. Director Antoine Fuqua lends a sweeping touch to glorious scenery. He throws a ton of firepower, stunt shooting, and riding, and oh no – a Gatling gun to the showdown. He gives each man a solid role, sharp dialogue, and a chance to squint into the sun as he reflects on his fate.

Denzel Washington lends the gravitas necessary for Sam Chisolm, the bounty hunter. Ethan Hawke is a twitchy former Confederate soldier. Chris Pratt is the slick cardsharp gunslinger, and Vincent D’Onofrio is the grizzled coot. Byung-hun Lee, Manuel Garcia-Rulfo, and Martin Sensmeier fill in the final seven. I read somewhere that it’s the United Benetton Western.  Peter Sarsgaard is the slimy villain who owns the mine and wants to run roughshod over the neighboring town and steal all of the land. Boo hiss

The seven choose to tilt against windmills and fight for the little guy. They help the townsfolk with their pitchforks and rifles and vow to save the women and children. It’s a noble fight and entertaining. The Magnificent Seven won’t be considered a classic, but it’s a popcorn worthy movie. Round ‘em up and head to the theater. 

Movie Review - The Hateful Eight

There’s good Tarantino – Pulp Fiction, and there’s bad – Django Unchained comes to mind. Let’s add his latest,  The Hateful Eight,  to the bad list but it could have been so good.  Someone needs to give director Quentin Tarantino a machete to cut this film from three hours to less than two. Someone needs to not be so indulgent with Quentin being so full of himself, and just say, “Get on with the story.”

The opening scenes are gorgeous as we watch a stagecoach in the snow. He also shows what looks like a gnarled tree is actually a stone crucifix – ah, symbolism. In the first hour, we pile a mix of outlaws and lawmen into the coach, only to arrive at Minnie’s Haberdashery in a blizzard, and find another group of suspicious characters. The clock is ticking for a bloodbath. Samuel L. Jackson is a principled bounty hunter given to well proclaimed pronouncements. Kurt Russell is holding onto Jennifer Jason Leigh, an urchin outlaw.  There’s a sheriff, a hangman, cowboy, and a general. There is leftover feelings from the Civil War and banter on racism and bigotry. Too much meandering, too much rambling talk, too many cold characters we don’t care about.

In the final thirty minutes, we find out why everyone is at Minnie’s except Minnie and her husband. Tarantino flashes back to show us the behind the scenes gathering of these vultures. It’s almost like an Agatha Christie game of Clue, only with extreme violence. It’s a shame. The acting is fine. There’s some interesting dialogue. It’s filmed richly and the musical score is grand. But, The Hateful Eight is cold and ugly, devoid of a reason to unspool.